Yesterday......was horrible!! I mean it was a really, REALLY bad day!! I thought seriously about attacking and inflicting severe bodily injury to my employer. The attorney for whom I practice law, without a license, daily!! For not enough pay I might add!!! Not NEAR enough!!
THEN....I leave work, after working 40 minutes over, trying (and I mean TRYING) to get said employer prepared for a deposition which was to take place today. I call my hubbie pie to relate the woes of may day to him, and basically just have me a little pity party on my way home! Well, he gets home before I do, and he is still talking to me, and in the background.....I hear her! OH NO SHE ISN'T!! My hubby said when he got out of the car and turned around, there she stood....lying in wait...in the shrubbery!
SHE would be my little neighbor lady who takes great pleasure in COMPLAINING!!! Now, mind you, I have always been respectful and kind to her while she is complaining about whatever she has on her mind that day. I might also add that I maintain the dickens of a HEDGE that is between our houses. (Thank Goodness for that hedge) But my hubby and I sweat and fret over that flippin hedge every summer, so she won't have to. I mean it is tall, way over my head!! And wide, about 4 feet. We trim and pull weeds and weedeat and rake and make her side pretty too. Still, she complains.
Saturday, as I was raking up pinestraw and pinecones in my yard from the storms that had blown through, she came over and told me she hoped I wasn't going to put much up at the road, cos' she was going to need all that room for her yard clippings! Our houses are the only ones on this side of the street, an entire block! And she was going to need it all! Okay......I said, I am almost finished!
Sunday we worked in our flower beds, and I mean WORKED! Raking, pruning, pulling up "stuff" I didn't like. Her clippings were already at the road, so I am good to go! Oh, nooooooooooooooooo, no, no!
Fast forward to yesterday! She is telling my husband that she does not want us to put any more debris or anything at the street there anymore! WHAT?
I am telling my husband what to say over the phone, and of course he is not saying it. (He is MUCH kinder and MUCH more laid back than me) So I accelerate said car so I can get home and deal with this once and for all!
When I arrive, there she still stood, chewing out sweetie pie husband, who is standing there with his little paper and mail in his hands and she is just wagging that finger at him. At MY sweetie pie husband who trims her hedges! WELL......enter Lou Cinda in all of her glory after a TERRIBLE day at work on top of everything else!!! (I have mentioned before that I am a tall woman, 5'10" flat footed and I am wearing 3" stilettos. I want you to get the visual here.) Little neigbor lady is about 4'1".
Now, I did try to be nice and point out to her that she was mistaken in her efforts to tell us we cannot put anything on the road IN FRONT OF OUR OWN HOUSE!! Okay, things got a little snippy as she proceeded to tell me she would never put anything in front of someone elses house. HELLOOOOOO? All of her stuff was in front of my house!!! This is the SIDE of her house! After I decided that we were getting nowhere I go in the house and leave hubby pie out there with her. She looks at him and says.......get this........are you ready......
"I don't know how you stay married to her.
She is the most high strung woman I have
ever met."
What a hoot!!!! I have been dealing with her for 2 years, and I finally......snapped, somewhat. Then she proceeds to tell my husband that she will dig up our driveway cos' it is on her property!!! Well, of course it isn't! But I told him, well, let her trot on up there with a jack hammer and have at it!
I told her I would call the city today and have them come and pick up the "stuff" which I did, and they did. Maybe she will be happy today.
I have prided myself with the fact that we are (were) the only people in the neighborhood who get (got) along with her! That's over!!
As I was relaying the story to my girlfriend Jamie last night, (she has had "dealings" with little neighbor lady too), we got just hysterical laughing about it. We decided I should go stand on the deck in my suit and stilettos in the dark, so all you could see is my silhouette, and hold up my chain saw in the darkness and just rev it over towards her house! Of course, I didn't do it, but.......she better leave me alone!
Today....has been a MUCH better day!
AND I want to tell you about a give away!!! Rachel over at yardsalemama.blogspot.com is having a great, great giveaway. So go on over and check it out!!! I really enjoy her blog, she is very creative and talented!!
Hope no one is lurking in my shrubbery when I go home today!!!
Lou Cinda :)
The buick ohana 2014
10 years ago
What a funny story~well, not so much for you when it was happening! Is she elderly? If so, she may be set in her ways. Anyhow, she had no right to make the comment she did to your hubbie about staying married to you...I would have saw red!
ReplyDeleteGlad today is better, Lou Cinda!
xoxo
Jane
Glad today was better, but your bad day yesterday made for some great reading.
ReplyDeleteYou do realize that to the rest of us this sounds hilarious?! I know it was terrible for you though. I've had a run in with one neighbor before and it was very uncomfortable, to say the least.
ReplyDeleteAs we like to say down here in Texas, "Well, bless her heart!". Oh my, she was pushing all the buttons wasn't she? Your husband sounds like a jewel standing there and not unloading on her. I guess he learned about respecting your elders...too bad she didn't learn about loving thy neighbor as thyself!
ReplyDeleteIt did make for a fun read, though. Sorry about that!
Debbie
Girl, when you get to heaven, you will have a star in your crown for putting up with her! That is...if you go to heaven! :) Just kidding!
ReplyDeleteWhy don't you whip out a piece of law firm letter head and type up an official looking letter to her? That will get her going!
Malisa
Oh yeah, she was definitely pushing buttons. I wonder why it is that little old ladies think they can get away with stuff like that? Maybe because we let them?
ReplyDeleteI am sorry I am laughing right now, I know how mad you must have been upset, but just the vision of you towering in your stilettos like a giant over your crack pot neighbor. and your sweet hubby who sounds a lot like mine...well Lou, it is so dang funny.Elderly neighbor? Bloody Hell. Bet she has been like this her whole life. How many husbands has she killed off? Girl, some day we are going to meet. I am adopting you, and that's final.
ReplyDeleteNext time you are down, let me know. I am about an hour north of Walt Disney World. I would love it.
ReplyDeleteLooks like I'm going to have to make you a lulu-version of 'ass-knuckles'. What? You don't know what ass-knuckles are? Weeellll...after I finish my cocktail I'll figure it out and come up with a prototype...in the meantime...U GO GURL
ReplyDeleteox lulu
Oh, Thank You for helping with the Junk Sistas!
ReplyDeleteYou are such a doll.
trailer trash
It doesn't matter what neighborhood you reside, there is ALWAYS a neighbor like her. Why is it ALWAYS a HER????
ReplyDeleteLove your blog banner and the title.
Thanks for entering my giveaway, Good LUCK!!
Kris
Oh, too funny! I think we can all relate to that story. Some times being nice doesn't pay off.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to Twin's tomorrow and we will be getting your welcome in the mail tomorrow or Sat. so be looking for it.
I am so glad today is better!
ReplyDeleteIt is not always a "her", old men can be horrible neighbors too. I don't have it too bad but the lady next door always points out everything I do in the yard is wrong. She also told my daughter-in-law she was going to get cancer for laying out in the sun, as she was puffing on her cigarette. You just have to smile and nod and keep walking!
ReplyDelete