I am one of those people that tries to never take anything for granted. I have learned this the hard way, unfortunately. I lost both of my parents at relatively young ages, my daddy was 62 and my mother was 65. This has been such a tremendous loss in my life and not a single day goes by that I don't yearn for both of them.
My daddy used to tell me I was "Resilient"! I loved that! I am fortunate to be a very upbeat and cheerful person and that, along with my resilience and unwavering faith have led me through some pretty dark times.
I have mentioned on here that I have been married three times. Yes, three. If someone would have asked me how many times I thought I would be married when I was younger, never in a million years would I have thought I would be twice divorced. The first one, not too too traumatic. In fact, I still run into that ex occasionally, and we hug and chat. He was unfaithful...I found out....divorced him...moved on. I was young.
Second time...a frigging nightmare!! 16 years of hell, except for the two beautiful and wonderful boys that I now have. I tried to hang in there, because I did not want to be divorced again. I felt that I had taken vows and needed to stay. One day I went and talked to my pastor who was well aware, probably more so that me at that time, of the things that the demonseed I was married to was doing. He took my hands, looked me square in the eye and said, "Lou Cinda, get out of this marriage." Pretty powerful! It was the boot I needed so I did it!
It was not easy, the ex made it as difficult as possible for me and my precious boys. He broke in our house when I was at work and the kids at school. He did not have a job, so he would come by the house after I had left for work and before Cameron's ride picked him up for school, and he would ask my baby Cammie Pie for his lunch money. And he would, of course, give it to him, and go to school and not eat. I did not know this for quite a while and when Cameron finally told me, I was devastated beyond belief! That husband was verbally and physically abusive off and on for 16 years. When I was done, I was DONE! There was no going back, no giving it another try. It was OVER! He does not see our boys, and I am glad. He is not a good role model for them, actually, he is not a good anything. Never paid child support, I did it on my own. It wasn't easy, but we survived.
I said I would never marry again. I had bad taste in men, poor judge of character! NO WAY! The months went by and a friend called and told me she wanted me to meet someone! A BLIND DATE!! You have GOT to be kidding me! I am 45 years old! Not gonna do it! She convinced me that I should go, that he was a nice guy. Yeah, right! I consented, BUT I told her I would meet him somewhere, and only if she and her husband went, which is what we did.
That blind date was my precious, kind, beloved, adorable Steve. The first second I laid eyes on him something deep in my soul said, "this is the one." I think it was God. I think he led me to Steve, he knew Seth and Cameron and I deserved him. He knew we needed him. He knew he would take care of us. Steve lived and worked in another town about 40 miles from me and he had no children of his own. He drove back and forth to my house from his every night!
Now, I am the wide open, fly by the seat of my pants, "high strung" type, and that is probably sugar coating it! Steve is stable, quiet, laid back, gentle, kind and has the purest heart...
The poor man did not know what hit him! From that night on we were inseparable and 7 months later we were married! He moved here, we sold my house, sold his house and bought "our" house, which we love. He commutes to work everyday, about 40 minutes one way. Just celebrated our 4th anniversary and I have never been happier. He took my boys on as his own, bought them cars when they turned 16, changes their oil, fixes stuff when it breaks and "we" are getting Seth through college. It is not easy being a step parent and I do know this. We have had our moments, because I tend to be more in the "gray" area and Steve is a little more black and white. Either it is this or this, no in between. I'm big on in between! lol I love it that he still seems so happy to see me when he comes home in the afternoon! His face just lights up when he walks in the door. And my heart just skips a beat every time I look at him.
Sometimes you have to walk through the fire to learn that each day is a gift and that nothing is guaranteed! Tell those you love that you love them....often...daily!
Sometimes you walk through that fire so that when that one perfect for you person walks into your life you appreciate them!
Sometimes you walk through that fire so that when the wounds heal and you are left with the scars, you realize a wisdom and an inner strength that you didn't know you had.
Sometimes you walk through that fire, because it is the only way out...
The buick ohana 2014
3 years ago